Alright, here goes. Another embarrassing truth from the frontlines of queerbabymaking:
I had a sex dream about my sperm donor last night.
Now, I've certainly heard stories from women who have used known donors (usually friends of theirs, or at least, close acquaintances), and who, while inseminating in a purely turkey-baster fashion, had some surprisingly sexual feelings for the donor surface. This makes sense to me. After all, there's a real intimacy involved in the process of inseminating, and I can see how the donor would become a vortex for some of the energies and desires floating around.
I, however, did not use a known donor. My sperm arrived each month in a liquid nitrogen tank that bore more resemblance to R2D2 than to an actual living person. My sperm bank didn't offer fancy services like donor photographs or audio files of their donors speaking. No, all I know about Donor 3691 is what came printed on the long profile form sent to me by my bank. And yet, last night, I had a disturbingly vivid dream about getting it on with my impregnator.
Now, lest you think this dream is merely me rewriting the history of baby's conception into a more "natural" script, I have to tell you this: in my dream, I was already pregnant. Yes, that's right: I dreamt that I met my donor after conceiving through alternative insemination, and then had an affair with him.
And for those of you who are worried about me losing my dyke membership card, you can rest assured that in my dream I confidently informed Donor 3691, "Oh don't worry, I'm a lesbian!" You know, right before I kissed him.
Oh my...
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Confession #3691
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
Ha!
Also funny, my word verification for this comment? fudqdpo
The same thing happened to me, but with a twist: it was more romantic than sexual, but I would kind of fall for my donors until AFTER the insemination, at which point I found them rather disgusting and just wanted them to dissappear. I ultimately used a known donor who I feel very good about, but every time he calls to ask how I'm doing (which isn't very often) his voice is like nails on a chalkboard and I just want to escape. I know I'm being a real jerk about it, but I can't help myself!
Sex in a dream, regardless of who its with, is usually symbolic of an 'intimate' connection w/ said person. It's not surprising you had this dream and more importantly were already pregnant. It is probably just your subconscious' way of manifesting the connection that you will always have with your child's father. Period. Not a 'justification' or trying to 'rationalize conception', but simply a recognition of the connection the biologiclly exisits. *shrugs* IMO :) Thanks for sharing. Awesome read!
Post a Comment